Category Archives: Bitching

I bitch a lot.

Tipping In New Jersey

There’s a story going around about a waitress in New Jersey who wasn’t just stiffed on an 8-person $112 check…

lol-tip

… she was left a nice little message as well.

This is unacceptable. If you have an issue waiting that long for food, you talk to the manager and get some money taken off of your bill. If the waitress was telling the table the entire time about how long it would take on the food and there was no issue up to that point, then there’s no issue at all, period.

It’s not like the waitress was also cooking the food, in which case, you’d have to expect an hour wait time while she does both jobs at once. Since she’s obviously not cooking the food, then how can you hate on her for the wait time?

People who do this kind of shit are going to find whatever excuse they can to not tip. I used to be a server and I had tables like this all the time. They knew going out they weren’t going to tip. They never tip. And most of the time they run the server to death. These are the people who need to never leave the house.

Roller Coaster Deaths

Too soon? Not nearly soon enough. Recently (like, yesterday) a man was at Cedar Point in Ohio. While on a roller coaster, his belongings fell out of his pocket. When he got off the ride, he told nobody about it, scaled the restricted fence around the ride, looked for his shit, and was hit by the coaster which was still in operation, killed instantly.

He deserved what he got because he was a dumbass.

red-forman-bad-things-dumbass

The sad thing is, this happens all the time.
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You Don’t Understand

I hate a lot of things in this world, almost all of them are related to people in one way or another. One of the things we’ve become good at is using words or phrases out of habit instead of their intended use. One of the ones I hate more than any other is “You don’t understand.”

Some people say it between sentences like they’re taking a breath. For instance, a few years ago someone I know was reacquainted with her long lost brother. I took her to meet him after 16 years of not seeing each other. It was awesome that they finally found one another.

While we were having lunch and they were catching up, he kept saying, “Oh, you don’t understand…” and then would say something about how he searched for her here and there.

Uh, yeah, she DOES understand. She’s the one who found you because she was looking for you for 16 years, just like you were looking for her. You were both in the same situation. If anybody understands EXACTLY WHAT THE FUCK YOU WERE GOING THROUGH, it was her.

He must have said it 100 times. He began every sentence with that phrase. I wanted to shove a brick in his mouth to keep him from saying it again.
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Fact Checking The Internet

It’s getting so bad anymore that I just don’t want to hear or read anything. I’ve already stopped watching the news because of the horrible shit that is shown on it all the time. And now, damn you internet, for being so full of shit.

Naturally you can’t believe anything you read online. Hell, how can you fact check anything you read online, by doing the fact checking online?

I started following a website called ViralNova, because they have nice articles. I say “nice” because they are. Pictures of cute animals or interesting stuff. Things that are nice, not horrible (for the most part). I need less horrible in my life and more nice.

And then, just now, I came across this article, 29 Weird History Facts You Probably Didn’t Learn In High School. I read the article, found it to be amazing, then did some fact checking. That’s when I realized I didn’t learn this stuff in school because some of it is complete bullshit. That’s when I also realized that even ViralNova doesn’t fact check, like most of the people on Facebook who post this shit and freak out.

Out of the 29 things ViralNova listed, they got a few wrong.
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The Price Of Being Nice

The company I work for has a rewards program, because who the fuck doesn’t nowadays, amirite? This rewards program started sometime around 2004. I was delivering pizzas then for another company than the one I recently left, when it started. Gas was around $4 a gallon here (it’s currently around $2.70) and everyone was pissed off. When this rewards program started, it offered everybody who signed up a five or ten cent discount per gallon, I can’t remember which, and that naturally got everyone to sign up like I did.

That discount only lasted until the end of that summer, but the perks for using it are still going. If you buy so much shit and scan your card, you get free shit. You can also get gift cards for restaurants or free gas. You know how it works, right?

At this point, more than a decade later, the only people who don’t know about the program are those people who moved to the east coast from the west coast or to here from another country, because our gas station is only on the east coast. Hell, we have kids who come in with their own cards. They can actually save money on gas, and they’re not old enough to drive. Excellent.

The point here is, BY NOW, most of the people who regularly shop at any of these stations knows about the card and the rewards program, and they have made up their minds whether they want to have a card or not. Hell, most of the people I ask for their card tell me they left it on their key ring in their car, because most of the people stopping in for stuff other than gas leave their cars running, and thus leave their rewards cards in the car. Kind of pointless to have the fucking thing in the first place, but whatever, that’s their choice.

Now, here’s problem number uno. Recently I was told that I had made a list of employees, company wide, who had fallen below a 50% scan rate of the cards. The memo said something about how we have to make all of our customers aware of the program (I covered this, it has been around for over a decade, everybody fucking knows about it) and that we, as employees, should push it more so that we get above the 50% scan rate per week.

That sounds right. Right? They want their customers to know about the program and to sign up for it. Sure, why not? They have the system in place, they want people to use it.

EXCEPT, for those who absolutely do not want it, like all of those customers who have known about it for over a decade and haven’t got one yet, like all of those customers who give me attitude when I ask if they have one because they’re sick of fucking hearing it and they’re sick of being told how they should get one, like all of those customers who are running late to work and only stopped in for a coffee and don’t want to be bothered, they’re never going to sign up for one. Who do I have left to tell about the program?

Fucking nobody, that’s who.
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