Movie Review: Robocop

Hi folks! I just watched the reboot to an awesome movie franchise and I wasn’t happy with it.

End of review.
Continue reading

Music Review: Unlocking The Truth

Today is the day I first heard about Unlocking The Truth. If you haven’t heard about them, give it a minute, because they’re going viral all over the place. If you don’t want to wait, here’s what you need to know:

-There’s three of them.
-They play metal.
-They’re 12 years old.

And they’re good. They’re very good. They’re extremely talented young men who quite obviously want to rock your face off. And they do a good job of it. If you do a Youtube search, you’ll discover what I did. A long list of videos of them performing, whether at festivals, or on Time’s Square as people pass by and drop some change into their bucket, or on TV shows. They’re making a name for themselves, and they should. Because in this country, if there’s one thing we love, it’s kids with musical talent.

What’s sad is, not every kid in this country has that talent, or one like it that should be showcased. We celebrate it because it’s not the norm when it should be, at least in my humble opinion. So we celebrate them for what they’ve accomplished, and I’m not saying we shouldn’t, but it’s sad because of why we do.

So this morning as I surfed Youtube and watched more than a few of their videos, this is what I noticed.

For one, let’s be honest, they’re twelve. They haven’t lived yet. They have no life experiences yet. Metal is a serious genre of music, and in order to be taken seriously in it, you’ve got to be serious. I think these kids are going to be huge one day, and by god I hope they are. I hope they can succeed in a world where everyone gets a hit and is forgotten the next day. Because as soon as they’re of age and they’ve made their millions off their hit single, there’s going to be another group of kids, all eleven this time, who are going to be in the spot light.

Because of their age, they’ve got a lot of growing to do. Not just physically and mentally, but as musicians. While they’re extremely talented for their age, they naturally need to work on some things.
Continue reading

Crips, Bloods, And Juggalos

Making its rounds in the news lately, is a story about how the Insane Clown Posse is suing the FBI for labeling their fans, “Juggalos,” a gang. A great piece (much better than the original one I read) about it can be found here, including two Youtube videos of the two members of ICP, Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope, speaking out against the FBI and this ruling.

Despite what you think of ICP or their fans, this is complete bullshit on every level. Seriously. You can hate them all you want, but it’s like saying if you’re a fan of Green Day or Martina McBride, and you wear one of their shirts out in public, the cops can stop you and add your name to a database that says you’re in a gang. It doesn’t matter if you’re driving to work, or if you’re out with your family enjoying a picnic, or if you’re in the armed forces.

Let’s say you forgot to do laundry one day but you had to run to the store for milk so you could feed your little kids some cereal, and you throw on an ICP shirt because it’s laying around. You bought it back in 1994 at one of their concerts when you were thirteen. Now you’re a 33 year old marine who just came home from a tour overseas and you’re spending your last day at home with your kids before you have to go back. You go to the store to get some milk and BAM! You’re pulled over by the cops, they see your shirt, and now you’re in a database as a gang member. Thanks for fighting for our freedom and having to feed your kids whom you might never see again after today. Fucking gang member. Who are you to listen to music when you were barely a teenager twenty years ago?

ICP Hatchetman. This is a gang symbol. Good job, FBI.

ICP Hatchetman. This is a gang symbol. Good job, FBI.

Continue reading

Food Review: Skyline Chili

This is really for those of you who are located around the Cincinnati area and know of Skyline. The rest of you can bugger off. Really, get to fuck. Cause you won’t have a clue about what I’m talking about.

A few years back Skyline introduced habaƱero cheese for a limited time only. It went over so well they brought it in full time. Just a few years ago I worked at a Skyline and dealt with this cheese. There’s a Skyline right down the road from me and my wife and I eat there regularly, and have for years.

Continue reading

They’re Coming To Take Me Away

You may not know this, but I’m a paranoid guy. Seriously. I grew up paranoid, and even now it’s something that haunts me. Like, it’s a real thing.


When I was a kid living with my dad, we lived in a cul-de-sac. Any time during the day or night, if my dad was in the living room and somebody came to the end of the street and turned around, or even if one of the neighbors pulled into their driveway, he would get up, go to the window, and look out. Just to see who it was. That made me paranoid.

It followed me. As a teenager I lived with my mom and I had this one window in my bedroom that was high up on the wall. It was just high enough that I could look out it while standing up. Even then I thought, at night, people were in the back yard just watching me from it, even though in order to see me I would have had to be standing at the window, and they would have had to be quite a distance away from me, and they would have only seen my head.
Continue reading