Tag Archives: wrong turn

Movie Review: Wrong Turn Series (spoilers)

I just finished watching the entire Wrong Turn series, all four movies, and I have just a couple of things I’d like to say.

First of all, for those of you who don’t know, the movies are about a twisted backwoods family of inbreds who live in the woods of West Virginia and they kill and eat people. They’re all deformed because of inbreeding and they can’t speak, only using grunts.

They are very skilled hunters, though, and they typically get what they want. Also, they can’t be hurt too easily. Because of inbreeding, or whatever the reason, they have a very VERY high threshold for pain. In one of the movies, they said that a paper mill had shut down and all of their toxic chemical waste was accidentally spilled into the water and the family wound up contaminated by it and that helped to deform them.

Before watching them all, I had never seen any of them. My wife had seen the first and refused to watch it with me, saying it was too disgusting. At one point she said they all (the victims) die. By the time I got to the end of the movie I was highly upset. Not only do two of the victims survive, but it wasn’t all that disgusting.

I listened to the hype, and the hype ruined the movie for me. Not only that, but I really didn’t get into it all that much. It seemed like another blatant ripoff of Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Some cannibal freaks of nature kill and eat the victims who get lost in the woods while driving through unfamiliar territory. That sounds exactly like Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

But I digress, when the movie was over I was a little pissed because it didn’t even feel like the ending. It just sort of ends. That sucked.

Overall, I was pissed at the movie. It wasn’t that disgusting, it wasn’t that disturbing, and not enough people die in it. I’d give the first movie a two out of five. I’d like to give it more, but I can’t cause I just can’t.

Reluctantly, I watched the second one. Woah! What the hell happened here? The second movie dominated! I was really impressed with that one, more people die, Henry Rollins is in it and he’s a total badass, which is common knowledge anyway and we finally get to see some boobs. We also get our first sex scene of the series, but it’s not all that impressive. It’s between two of the deformed people.

I almost didn’t watch the second movie because it started out the exact same way as the first started. In the first, a rich guy is driving through WV in a Mustang. In the beginning of the second a rich woman is driving through WV in a Mustang. I almost turned it off there. But then she gets horribly slaughtered and my attention was grabbed.

Due to awesome deaths and Henry Rollins, the second movie gets a four star rating out of five. Nice.

And then I watched the third movie with high hopes. If there was that much of an increase in awesomeness from the first to the second, then the third should completely dominate. It did. The third movie was better than the second. Even more death, more gore, more disgusting shit and more creative deaths. So awesome. It also gets a four, and there was very little holding it back from getting a five.

That brought me to the fourth and last of the series, so far, Bloody Beginnings. It’s a prequel that not only shows what isn’t actually the beginning of the family, but a major part of their story which takes place in 1973 (I think), but also some events that happened in 2003, a year before the first movie took place. Side note, I read that should there be a part 5, it will also be a prequel, which I’m fine with.

I love prequels to horror movies. Typically they’re all great, and you can count on two things. Everybody dies. Everybody. The second is, the killer or killers win completely, otherwise how would the first movie have been made? The Texas Chainsaw Massacre prequel completely rocked as did the end of the movie.

Just like with that, the prequel to Wrong Turn dominated. Everybody died, the psycho inbred family all live and carry on their crazy eatin-people ways, and you get quite a few more beautifully creative deaths.

Probably my favorite is the doctor at the beginning of the movie with his hands and legs tied up in barbed wire and then he’s pulled apart piece by piece. Oh man, I love it.

The best is the ending, which is a candidate for best ending to a horror movie ever. The last two victims are getting away. They’re happy, they survived the crazy family and they’re in the home stretch. And then… BLAM! Decapitated. Both of them, at the same time. So awesome. Sorry to ruin the end for you, but it was so worth mentioning.

Oh, but there’s more. We finally get our first REAL sex scene in the fourth movie, and not just one. We get three awesome sex scenes, two of which are between two chicks! Boobs galore! It’s such a shame they had to die. Well, not really.

There was also a scene when a guy gets caught and tied up to a table with barbed wire. The deranged family really likes barbed wire. Then, while the man is still alive, they cut off slivers of his skin from various parts of his body, deep fry them and then eat them in front of him. I was eating a bag of pork rinds when this scene was taking place and had to put it aside. Seriously. Disgusting.

I have to give the fourth movie a five star rating out of five. I don’t normally do that because no movie is that good, but this movie was.

There are very little film series’ that exponentially get better from the first movie to the last, but this series does, and for that, I have to give the entire series a four out of five stars. Totally awesome stuff.

If there’s one thing I really enjoy in good horror movies, it’s really creative deaths. The Sleepaway Camp series had those, which is why it’s one of my favorite horror series’ of all time. Just like that, the Wrong Turn series is now one of my favorites as well, with no help from the first movie. Creative deaths, some disgusting scenes that turned even my stomach, and a couple nice boob shots just for good measure. Definitely check out the series if you haven’t already.

Here’s To You, Wayne Robson

For those of you who don’t know who Wayne Robson is, and I’m sure that’s probably quite a lot of you, I’ll tell you who he is.

Wayne Robson is a Canadian actor who has been doing television and movies for over 40 years in both Canada and America. His most famous role was of Mike Hamar on the Canadian TV show, The Red Green Show. He was the tiny older man who always wore blue jeans and a black t-shirt. He was always stealing things and getting himself caught up in crazy situations.

I’m a huge fan of The Red Green Show, and every now and then I see somebody on TV on some random show that was on The Red Green Show once or twice. But him, I never saw on anything until the other day.

Wayne as Mike Hamar on The Red Green Show

I was watching Wrong Turn 2 (which I’ll probably write a blog about) and I came across a scene between Henry Rollins and this old man. The old man looked familiar. I paused the movie and looked him up and sure enough, it was Wayne Robson.

Wayne as the father of the strange family in Wrong Turn 1 & 2

While I was on IMDB, I decided to look at everything he’s done, and I was shocked to find out that he had been in a lot of other things I had seen multiple times. I also found out that he’s done a whole lot of acting over the years.

Some of his works include, Kids In The Hall, Survival Of The Dead, The Timekeeper, The Incredible Hulk, Puppets Who Kill, the first Wrong Turn movie which I had just watched and didn’t even recognize him, National Lampoon’s Senior Trip, Dolores Claiborne, Robocop TV Series, the voice of Frank in the Disney movie The Rescuers Down Under, one of the most boring movies I ever tried to watch Candy Mountain, Popeye the movie with Robin Williams and Shelley Duvall, among many other things.

I also found something else out I didn’t know. From Wikipedia:

Robson passed away peacefully at his home on April 4, 2011 at the age of 64, the cause of death was not disclosed.

I was blown away. He has entertained me for many many years on The Red Green Show and he was always one of my favorite characters. After figuring out it was him in Wrong Turn 2, and also in the first one as well, I was happy to see a different side of him, see that he really was a good actor.

To hear of his death is a shame, really, and I for one am a fan who will miss him. Mister Wayne Robson, thank you for entertaining me for all of these years. I’m glad that you passed on peacefully, and I hope your name isn’t soon forgotten by those who have watched you for all of these forty years.