Welcome Back, Me!

Thanks, me. No problem, me.

Yeah, it has been a while since I’ve posted. Since January, actually. The reason for this is, the computer I’ve had for the last 15 years finally died on me and only today was I able to get a new one. Yeah, my old computer first came with XP on it, and then when Vista came out I put that on it, and that’s how it died. With Vista. Kinda sad, actually.

Since I’ve been gone some things have happened. Weed is almost legal everywhere now, Donald Chump and Killary Clinton are fighting for the White House, a kid had a gorilla killed, and mass people have been killed in Orlando, just to name a few things.

So, what do I think about them? Well, the gorilla thing pissed me off, since it happened in my city, and the gorilla was the one shot and killed, not the parent or the kid. I hate people, which you all should know by now. I love animals. The more people I meet, the more I love animals. I was super pissed when they killed the gorilla. And all for what? To save some dumbass kid who is probably going to grow up to be just as big a dumbass as his mom, maybe more so? Great. We have a planet overpopulated with people, most of which are dumbasses, so let’s save one who MIGHT be injured or killed by a gorilla. MIGHT. That was a word thrown around a lot in that case. We can’t live with mights.

So, 50 killed in Orlando? Good. Fuck ’em.

Chump and Killary? Fuck them, too. And the United States if either is elected president, which sadly it looks like one will be.

Fuck this whole place. The world is coming to an end. Let’s party. Weed’s legal now.

On a terrible, last minute side note, I think I don’t like my new computer. The keyboard isn’t keeping up with me. I’m not happy about that. I’m a fucking writer for crying out loud. This isn’t cool.

Restroom Encounters: Red Robin

For some strange reason, I’ve had some interesting things happen to me in public restrooms, and none of the sexy variety. Just strange. If any of you follow Twindaddy’s blog (which is gone, and I am sad), I once posted a story there about an experience I had at a Hooter’s, and since his blog is no longer there, I’ll repost the story here some time. A few strange moments happened there, in the restroom, and ever since then I’ve had some other random, crazy experiences in restrooms.

Here’s a new one. Just happened to me.

My wife and I were out tonight running some errands, and suddenly I had to pee. We were near a mall and a ton of shopping centers and stores. I was about to pull into a gas station to use their bathroom when I remembered there was a Red Robin up ahead of the gas station, attached to the mall. In order to eat there you have to go to their entrance from inside the mall, but they have a “rear” door where you can get in directly from the parking lot. Just off of that entrance are the bathrooms. You don’t even have to really enter the restaurant in order to use their bathrooms.

I decided to go there instead, because they always keep their bathrooms nicer than BP’s do.

I got lucky and found a parking spot real close to the entrance. I went in and entered the bathroom. There were one or two urinals and two stalls. As I went towards the stall at the back of the bathroom (cause I always use a stall) I noticed there was a guy standing at a urinal. I didn’t look right at him, just caught a glimpse of him out of the corner of my eye. Because I just got that corner of the eye glimpse at him, I’m only just kind of sure that I saw him turn to look at me as I went by.

Now, this is exactly why I go to stalls. Because I need a bit of privacy when I go to the bathroom. Remember how paranoid I am? Well, I need privacy in the fucking bathroom. I don’t need there to be people behind me watching me pee into a toilet hanging off the wall.

That, and, this guy.
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Movie Review: Victor Frankenstein

I got to see another movie in the theater! It doesn’t happen much, so excuse my giddiness.

victor-frankenstein-poster

That one. That’s the one I saw.

In one word, the movie was excellent. It relied heavily on CGI, which every movie does anymore. But, it had a few things that not every movie has.
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What They Be Doin’ Now? The Presidents of the United States of America

Welcome to a new piece that I’ve been trying to get started for well over a year now. This is my version of Where Are They Now? It’s called What They Be Doin’ Now? and the premise is one you’ve heard before. It all started when one day I heard a song by a 90s band I hadn’t heard in a long time, and it made me wonder what they were up to now. If they had survived, if they hadn’t. If the members went their separate ways and joined other bands. Because as we all know, especially of those 90s born bands, they were once Kings but are now… eh? …eh?

Sure we know Pearl Jam is still around and kicking, because they’re never going to go anywhere. Green Day is still going strong, for the most part. The Foo Fighters are still, in my opinion, one of the greatest rock bands of all time, and thank the gods above they’re still rocking hard.

But what about the rest of them? I’m sure they got fans out there still wanting to see them play. So are they touring? Recording? No matter the answer, I’m almost always surprised by what I find out, and this one is no different.
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Great Commercials: Tivo Bolt

I saw this during a football game and laughed too hard at it. Classic.